Boone
08-06-2000, 12:22 AM
Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss.
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Seagull Manager - A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything and then leaves.
Salmon day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.
Chainsaw consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the brass with clean hands.
CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon.
404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404-URL Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. Used as in: "Don't bother asking him... he's 404, man."
Ohno-second - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.
Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
Umfriend - A sexual relation of dubious standing or a concealed intimate relationship, as in "This is Dylan, my ... um...friend."
Body Nazis - Hard-core exercise and weightlifting fanatics who look down on anyone who doesn't work out obsessively.
Cube Farm - An office filled with cubicles....
Prairie Dogging - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
Stress Puppy - A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
Going Postal - Euphemism for being totally stressed out, and losing it. Makes reference to the unfortunate track record of postal employees who have snapped and gone on shooting rampages who feel that there is nothing that an AK-47 and a rooftop couldn’t solve.
Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group.
G.O.O.D. Job - A "Get-Out-Of-Debt" job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.
Yuppie Food Stamps - The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal: "We owe $8 each, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps."
<font color="#000000">[Edited by Boone on August 06, 2000 (edited 1 time)]</font>
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Seagull Manager - A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything and then leaves.
Salmon day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.
Chainsaw consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the brass with clean hands.
CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon.
404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404-URL Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. Used as in: "Don't bother asking him... he's 404, man."
Ohno-second - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.
Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
Umfriend - A sexual relation of dubious standing or a concealed intimate relationship, as in "This is Dylan, my ... um...friend."
Body Nazis - Hard-core exercise and weightlifting fanatics who look down on anyone who doesn't work out obsessively.
Cube Farm - An office filled with cubicles....
Prairie Dogging - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
Stress Puppy - A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
Going Postal - Euphemism for being totally stressed out, and losing it. Makes reference to the unfortunate track record of postal employees who have snapped and gone on shooting rampages who feel that there is nothing that an AK-47 and a rooftop couldn’t solve.
Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group.
G.O.O.D. Job - A "Get-Out-Of-Debt" job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.
Yuppie Food Stamps - The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal: "We owe $8 each, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps."
<font color="#000000">[Edited by Boone on August 06, 2000 (edited 1 time)]</font>